BODY & SOUL
How to help children to cope with grief
Julia Samuel, psychotherapist and founder of the Grief Works online therapy and support app, gives her advice
Julia Samuel: ‘You can tell them the truth over time rather than all at once, but everyone in the family needs to share the same story’
JOONEY WOODWARD FOR THE TIMES
Be as honest as possible
Our instinct is to protect children, and that’s OK, but if they know that something is going on, what they make up can be more frightening than the truth.
If a parent has a life-limiting illness, for example, the time between their diagnosis and their death is the only chance to have important conversations and build memories that children will relive for the rest of their lives. “Protecting” them from this can be very unhelpful, psychologically. You can tell them the truth over time rather than everything all at once, but everyone in the family needs to share the same story. It’s the missing pieces of the jigsaw, or not knowing what to believe, that can go on to haunt
